If you’ve read my blog enough and you know me personally, you’ll realise that I like to do a lot of daydreaming about the future. To be honest, I really do it to escape the unpleasant reality of the present.
Today, I went to one of the university on-campus housing facilities to pick up some stuff. I had to wait for about an hour for a friend of mine to be free so that I could pick up some other stuff from her place when she got home. So, I didn’t bother leaving. I remained parked in front of the halls of residence and tried to do a bit of reading up for surgery. Fun as that was, I couldn’t help looking up and watching people go about their business in their buildings. Almost instantly I was warped into a daydream once more…wishing, dreaming, wondering what it must be like to be living away from home…independently, for the most part. I know the day will come when I will undoubtedly have these experiences myself and I tend to look forward to it a lot.
That’s not to say that I’m extremely miserable and unhappy here. Surely, I’m not at the brim of the happiness jar…I’d say it’s about a 1/3 full. There are the goods and the bads and the happys and the sads, the advantages and the disadvantages to each way of life. I know I’ll have the experience of both but I’m a little tired of the repetitiveness of my university.
I don’t really think about how I’ll escape my labyrinth. I think about having escaped it already. The how isn’t an issue, so much so than the when. Regardless, since starting clinical rotations, I’ve been so busy that these thoughts come to me less and less but the desire to leave will never go away.